Naughty Not Nice: 10 Very Cheeky Holiday Movies to Watch on Netflix and Elsewhere
Christmas isn’t easy. All the stress, the spending, the forced family time, the endless Mariah Carey on repeat…god help us…so much Mariah. Sometimes you need something a little darker and more cynical to take the edge off the festive season. We hear you, so we’ve swapped out some “warm and fuzzies” for a few “cold and nasties”.
If you’re getting tired of being recommended the same ‘happy and jolly’ Christmas movies year after year, then this is the list for you. Not a Love Actually or Home Alone in sight. These are the 10 most naughty, cheeky and nasty Christmas movies available to watch right now.
Merry Christmas? Bah humbug!
10. Four Christmases (2008)
The Lowdown:
Fans of Reese Witherspoon and Vince Vaughn will enjoy this cynical take on family get togethers at Christmas. Brad (Vaughn) and Kate (Witherspoon) detest the idea of marriage and kids. To dodge their families on Christmas, they decide to go overseas. When their plans fall apart, they instead have to do the family rounds like the rest of us.
What amounts to a decent spin on the Christmas movie, actually features one of the most impressive supporting casts you’ll find. The likes of Robert Duvall, Mary Steengurgen, Jon Voight, Sissy Spacek and Jon Favreau all appear in Four Christmases.
Cheeky Quote:
“You really can’t spell ‘families’ without lies. Try it.”
– Brad (Vince Vaughn)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Now Streaming on Netflix*
9. Friday After Next (2002)
The Lowdown:
Safe to say that Friday After Next is not to everyone’s taste. But if you’re looking for a Christmas movie with terrible jokes around every bend, you’ve come to the right movie. Fans of the Friday series will immediately feel at home, while others may be shaking their heads throughout. But who ever said silly movies can’t be a fun watch? Ignore the snobbery and enjoy the ride.
Craig and Day Day have finally moved out of their parents houses and into their own crib. The cousins work nights at a local mall as security guards. When their house is robbed on Christmas Eve they team up to track down the culprit.
Cheeky Quote:
“That’s right. Got my ass back in the projects. The only place where you get robbed by Santa Claus on Christmas Eve.”
– Craig Jones (Ice Cube)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Now Streaming on Netflix*
8. A Bad Moms Christmas (2017)
(AKA: Bad Moms 2)
The Lowdown:
Known as A Bad Moms Christmas around the world (and Bad Moms 2 locally…don’t ask me why), this is a sequel that demands you turn off your brain, pour yourself a tall glass of red, sit back and bask in it’s insanity. Yes, it’s ridiculous. No, it’s not an award winner. Yes, you might come out of it a few brain cells lighter…but who cares? It’s just fun.
This Bad Moms sequel follows our three under-appreciated and over burdened women as they rebel against the challenges and expectations of the Super Bowl for moms: Christmas.
Cheeky Quote:
“Let’s put the ‘ass’ back in Christm-ass.”
– Carla (Kathryn Hahn)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Now Streaming on Netflix*
Now Streaming on Stan*
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
7. Office Christmas Party (2016)
The Lowdown:
A movie that probably should have stuck to a more simpler plot around one of most potentially awkward annual events most of us experience each year. Instead, Office Christmas Party goes full-tilt on story. Most of it a fun watch with a pretty solid cast, some of it just too convoluted to care for. A good Christmas distraction either way.
When the CEO (Jennifer Aniston) tries to close her hard-partying brother’s branch, he (T.J. Miller) and his Chief Technical Officer (Jason Bateman) must rally their co-workers and host an epic office Christmas party in an effort to impress a potential client and close a sale that will save their jobs.
Cheeky Quote:
“Hey, God. I know I haven’t asked for a lot in this life. Granted, I was born rich… and white… and a man… and straight. Well, except for that one time in Vegas, but that was Vegas.”
– Clay Vanstone (T.J.Miller)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
6. The Night Before (2015)
The Lowdown:
The Night Before is one of those movies that looks amazing from the trailer, but doesn’t quite nail the full length. Regardless, it will keep you watching until the end thanks to its likeable cast. As you’d expect from Seth Rogen and friends, it’s a stoner comedy with a festive spin. Our advice: Roll it up, light it and take it in for what it is. It may just take your mind off the seasonal stress for a couple of hours.
Three friends since childhood have a yearly Christmas Eve reunion which has been an annual night of debauchery and hilarity. Now that they’re entering adulthood, the tradition is coming to an end, and to make it as memorable as possible, they set out to find the Nutcracka Ball – the Holy Grail of Christmas parties.
Cheeky Quote:
“I think the cocaine and the mushrooms are acting poorly.”
– Isaac (Seth Rogan)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
5. Better Watch Out (2016)
The Lowdown:
If Home Alone aint your thing, allow us to introduce you to that movie’s twisted cousin. Better Watch Out is a nasty piece of work that isn’t afraid to press your buttons. You’ll giggle, you’ll shriek, you’ll cringe and you will most likely call time on some of its harsher scenes. Reprehensible? Maybe. A clever twist on the invasion horror genre? Most definitely. But it’s not for everyone, so you’ve been warned.
On a snowy night in the suburbs, babysitter Ashley looks after precocious 12-year-old Luke. What begins as a normal evening soon takes a dark turn when intruders break into the house.
Cheeky Quote:
“What delusional infant thinks that staging a break-in is going to get you to second base?”
– Ashley (Olivia DeJonge)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
4. Anna and the Apocalypse (2017)
The Lowdown:
We’re calling it right now – Anna and the Apocalypse is the greatest ‘Zombie Comedy Horror Christmas Musical’ you will ever see. When a zombie apocalypse threatens the sleepy town of Little Haven, Anna and her friends must fight, slash and sing their way to survival, facing hellish snowmen, an undead Santa and bloodthirsty elves in a desperate race to reach their loved ones hiding out at their local high school.
This crowd favourite brings alot of fun back to Christmas and you’ll even discover has a pretty big heart by the time the credits roll. Sadly dismissed by some as a Shaun of the Dead copycat with songs, we can’t see how being compared to Shaun of the Dead could ever be a bad thing.
Cheeky Quote:
“Oh no! Justin Bieber’s a zombie!”
– Chris (Christopher Leveaux)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
3. Violent Night (2022)
The Lowdown:
With the spirit of Die Hard and a healthy dose of Bad Santa, Violent Night serves up an alternative take on Christmas that will please adults looking for some action over sentimentality this season. It’s mean spirited and certainly not for those with a weak stomach…but the movie’s title should be the dead giveaway on that before you press play.
David Harbour stars in this thrilling holiday movie about a team of mercenaries who take a group of people hostage on Christmas Eve, never expecting their biggest combatant to be Santa Claus.
Cheeky Quote:
“Santa’s gonna eat through these guys like a plate full of cookies”
– Santa Claus
Where to Watch the Fun:
Now Streaming on Netflix*
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
2. A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas (2011)
The Lowdown:
One thing is for sure. After watching any Harold & Kumar film, it’s safe to say that you will never see anything quite like it again. Over the top in its crassness and not afraid to go places other films would only dare, A Very Harold & Kumar Christmas is a high voltage stoner movie that pushes the envelope a bit far at times, but reins it back in with some genuine feel-good festive spirit.
After years of growing apart, Harold and Kumar are preparing for their respective Christmas celebrations, when a mysterious package arrives at Kumar’s door. In his attempt to deliver it to Harold’s house, he inadvertently burns down the family’s prized Christmas tree. Now, the hapless pair set off on another ill-advised and hilariously half-baked adventure in New York, on Christmas Eve, in search of the perfect Christmas tree.
Cheeky Quote:
“I shot Santa in the face! He’s real! And I shot him in the face!”
– Harold (John Cho)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Now Streaming on Netflix*
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
1. Bad Santa (2003)
The Lowdown:
The undisputed Shawshank of naughty and cheeky Christmas movies, Bad Santa is a timeless winner. Sure, it’s as crass and foul mouthed as you remember, but its success lies in the redemption story at its heart. Under all the glorious profanity and anti-Christmas sentiment, there is actually a sweetness to Bad Santa that you probably forgot existed.
A miserable conman and his partner pose as Santa and his Little Helper to rob department stores on Christmas Eve. But they run into problems when the conman befriends a troubled kid, and the security boss discovers the plot.
Cheeky Quote:
“Why don’t you wish in one hand, and sh*t in the other. See which one fills up first.”
– Willie (Billy Bob Thornton)
Where to Watch the Fun:
Rent or Buy in the Movie Store on Fetch
